MHA #4; Wednesday [04/28].

[somethingwithturquoise]

There were no jello shots at Caritas tonight.

In fact, there was no Summer at Caritas tonight, either.

What would even be the point? The island was going crazy, and everyone should probably stay at home! Sure, Caritas was a safe space, and that was good if anyone needed it, and it was literally right across the street so it wouldn't take long to get there, but, knowing her luck? Ha! She'd probably be dead before she barely stepped out the door!

Not that she figured she was much safer in her own apartment, because she did not at all trust those looks Pancakes was giving her, and this wouldn't even be the first time a pet had threatened her! At least Pancakes didn't have a mech suit, though!

....YET.

Besides, she was thoroughly convinced that anyone who actually did go to Caritas would have a much better time without her there. Because that's just how it was. Things were always better without her. Just look at her parents' lives if she hadn't been born, and the Resistance was probably thriving now that she was out of the picture. Why do you think Grampa Rick only ever wanted to take Morty on adventures and never her? Because she sucked. And things always sucked more when she was involved. Tino didn't need her there. Tino probably didn't even want her there.

No one did.

And it definitely didn't help that Summer just could not stop doomscrolling through all the happy, perfect posts from people on all her socials, almost as if something that knew it would only exacerbate these feelings was compelling her to keep doing so.

[[ very much open! with potential bouts of SP because work has been stupid stressful lately, ugh ]]

Comments

[1000yearstoolate]

But because Summer wasn't at Caritas offering jello shots, someone got even more worried.

This was why Seivarden knocked on her door in the evening, although it might be considered banging.

"Summer! Are you there?!"

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Jesus!"

It didn't even need to be full-fledged banging to startle the crap out of Summer, jumping to the point where her phone lept out of her hand and a startled gasp of dread escaped her as she went scrambling for it, expecting to see a black and shattered screen, and then letting out a sigh of relief to see that it was fine.

Which meant now she could just glare at the door before marching over to wrench it over, an action she regretted doing the moment she was doing it, because, ohmygod, what if it wasn't actually Seivarden and it was just...something with Seivarden's voice and she'd just opened the door to her doom.

But so far...no doom. Just Seivarden, and she gave an almost withering sigh. "What? Of course I'm here. Where else would I be?"

Because she was just a hopeless loser with no real friends and everyone hated her and were much better off without her, geez, duh!

But then the worry swept fright back in, and with it, a frantic immediacy in her tone. "Why? What's wrong? Is everything okay?"

A beat.

An epic roll of her eyes. At herself.

"Besides literally everything right now, I mean."

Obvs.

[1000yearstoolate]

Seivarden crossed her arms nervously. "You are usually at Caritas on Wednesdays," she pointed out. "And because, well, the way things... I mean."

She held up a bottle of arrack.

"I brought this."

Yes, she had brought her own booze to a bar, because during a week like this Summer should have some good Radchaai arrack.

[somethingwithturquoise]

"I'm pretty sure Tino can handle it," Summer murmured, before her eyes lingered suspiciously on the bottle. She looked back at Seivarden.

"Why?"

That was just a clearly egregious waste of perfectly good space booze, Seivarden. Summer drank vodka and Red Bull and liked it. There was clearly a catch here.

[1000yearstoolate]

"Because I need a drink, and I thought you might too."

She really needed a drink. Really needed it, in a way she knew wasn't good.

[somethingwithturquoise]

Summer blinked at that.

Sure, she knew Seivarden didn't have a lot of other friends right now, but she was pretty sure at least Amaya lived closer than she did. And Tisarwat did, too, technically! Even if only by a hallway.

"God," she murmured, stepping back to open the door a little more and make room for Seivarden to come in, "you must really be desperate, huh?

"Just watch out for Pancakes," she added as she just shuffled to the couch, where she plopped down and assumed the phone-scrolling position she'd held pretty much all day. "I'm pretty sure she's plotting murder."

[1000yearstoolate]

Seivarden followed Summer, relieved to have been let in. She slumped down next to Summer on the couch.

"Issa is hiding under the bed."

She opened the bottle and offered it to Summer.

[defenderofdesmoines]

are you okay????

Annie was not under the island's influence, no, but she was stuck in her own universe's New York with her boyfriend who couldn't seem to get back to the island, so obviously something was wrong.

(Also it was totally fine he was stuck, okay? Nothing was weird or awkward. This was great. She was having a great time with this, really.)

[somethingwithturquoise]

Summer was narrowing her eyes at that text about seven different ways to Sunday, because why, out of anyone, would Annie-Fucking-January, newly minted big time fucking superhero Starlight, be texting her right now??? Out of anyone who probably had no use for Summer anymore, she was right up there at the top of the list, clearly.

Cannon fodder, maybe? The portal gun, perhaps? Well, good fucking luck with that, even that wasn't working right now!

Fine.

Why elaborate? It wasn't like Annie would actually care, this was probably just some performative bullshit, like she felt obligated to just remind Summer she existed or whatever. Or wanted to brag about how awesome everything was for her now...

Y?

R U OK???

[defenderofdesmoines]

totes fine!! but Diego came to visit and now he can't get a portal back to the island. is something going on there?????

Because that was totally what Annie needed, seriously, for Diego to continue to be stuck in her apartment while she went out and took marketing meetings and did autograph signings. He had to be sooooo bored! So bored!

...and like, other than the boredom thing, it was fine, though. Because she loved him and nothing was weird, okay.

[somethingwithturquoise]

Okay, so Annie texting her right now when Diego was there was not helping, because now there were even more better things she could be doing right now, so she tried to think of how best to explain it without wasting any more of what she was sure was Annie's precious time.

Island's going super batshit again. honestly he's probably lucky he's with you instead. there's monsters everywhere and creepy shit and it's really fucking terrible and i hate it. 😞

[defenderofdesmoines]

OH NO.

So on the one hand, she was pretty glad that Diego was with her, yes, because it meant she wouldn't have to worry about him versus creepy shit on his own.

On the other, it meant she was now worried about, like, literally every other person she knew. Damn it.

if outgoing portals work you can come stay in my swank apartment away from creepy shit??

Her apartment was huge, Summer. It would be like a slumber party! And oh no it would be so sad how she and Diego wouldn't be able to attempt to have bad sex with each other anymore what a shame.

[somethingwithturquoise]

yeah because I'm sure that's exactly what you'd want, someone crashing in on your well-earned quality time with your bf right now

Seriously. Summer wished she could just tell Annie she could drop the nice-girl act, she really didn't need to waste her energy on actually pretending to care about her.

portals are fucked right now anyway so it doesn't even matter

[my_own_advocate]

It was Wednesday, and Wednesday was Caritas night, and yes, it had taken a moment for Lucifer to put Caritas night and complete bloody Fandom nonsense together and realize that, well.

please tell me you're not currently on the island and on vacation sipping mai tais somewhere

[somethingwithturquoise]

Okay, so now Summer was half-wondering if her phone was possessed or she should chuck it into the ocean because there was no way Lucifer was texting her now, too.

are the phones messing up again now too? Who is this?

Not that it matters because if they are, I won't get the response anyway but whateverrrrrrrr ugh

SORRY WHOEVER GETS THIS. JUST SAVE YOURSELF THE TROUBLE AND IGNORE

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer heard the bleep of an incoming text, and... Stared at his phone.

it's me, Lucifer, obviously. Are you all right?

[somethingwithturquoise]

You'd think that, after all these people asking her if she was okay, something would click in Summer's brain that maybe people actually did care, but of course it wouldn't be that simple!

I'm FINE.

If a text could manage to be desperately insistent, this text was definitely trying. And then Summer reached out to grasp onto the only thing she could think of that would cause Lucifer to care enough to text her, something she thought even without a weird crystal making her feel like literally everyone in the world hated her guts and were better off without her.

look, if this is about no jello shot at Caritas tonight, I'll make it up to u next week, ok? I just can't even right now

[my_own_advocate]

...

i'm in san diego Lucifer texted. why would I be texting you about jello shots at Caritas?

[somethingwithturquoise]

WHY would Lucifer take the time out of enjoying himself in San Diego to text HER? The jello thing made way more sense!!

To the point where Summer was confused out of even knowing how to respond at first, and went to the kitchen to pour herself a drink before she could even start putting a reply together.

your lucky. This place is being batshit again

And maybe they could just ignore that jello thing right now.

Actually, she should probably tell him he could just ignore her altogether, while he was at it. She honestly was surprised that he wasn't already.

[badassprodigy]

So, Barry had been neck deep in trying to find out what the living fuck was going on with the island with absolutely no luck. So when he swung by the bar to see that Summer wasn't at her post, he didn't try to track her down electronically or call... he just went directly to her apartment and knocked.

"Summer? You there?"

[somethingwithturquoise]

On the one hand, at least this was preventing Summer from wanting to curl up and die because Tricia went to a party last weekend and Nancy picked up major academic accolades for some dumb undergrad paper she put out ag her stupid ACTUAL college...

...on the other hand, that knock followed by that voice was her literal nightmare right now.

It was pretty dumb, really, thinking that Barry getting buried in figuring out the island's bullshit would be deep enough to prevent him from realizing how much she really did suck and finally come around to breaking up with her.

She considered not saying anything. She considered pretending she wasn't home. But that would only delay the inevitable, wouldn't it? Might as well get it over with so she could wallow in it completely....

"Yeahhhh," she called back, miserably, but making no effort to get up and actually answer the door. "I'm here."

Unfortunately.

[badassprodigy]

Oh and like that response didn't send paranoid vibes up Barry's spine. Not to mention ratcheting up his levels of worry and anxiety tenfold.

"Are you okay?" he called out with his voice cracking a bit. "Can I come in?"

[somethingwithturquoise]

Man. If they weren't careful, all these people asking if she was okay was going to start making Summer believe they actually cared or something.

And then where would they all be?

Summer bit her lip, half-wondering what would happen if she said no.

To either of those questions.

Then she breathed out, stepped herself, reminded herself that the quickest cuts hurt the least, and finally got up to go open the door.

"Okay," she said, once it was open, "let's just get it over with."

[badassprodigy]

There was a moment of relief when Summer opened the door. A relief in the sense that she was all right. Apparently just physically because the whole “Get this over with” statement just erased all of that.

“Get what over with?” He asked, looking extremely concerned now. “What’d I do now? Did I fuck up something?”

[somethingwithturquoise]

And Summer's brow knitted deeply in confusion, as a small sliver of...something...started to slip into the wrinkles of her brain to suggest that maybe, just maybe, she'd been wrong this whole time and Barry showing up tonight actually wasn't what she thought it was.

But that sliver had a lot to contend with right now. And Summer suddenly felt very strange, like whatever that sliver was, it was being forced into her stomach instead, ready to whither into something else entirely.

"Didn't you--" she started, bit she couldn't form the words, her mouth was too dry. She licked her lips, nervously, futilely, and tried for the only thing left, a bewildered, befuddled, "Why are you here?"